I totally agree that putting it up for discussion and admitting that you don’t have all the answers was a savvy move. If you had written a blog simply announcing what you did without opening it up to discussion that would have loosened the social ties instead of strengthening them. Even if you’d decided on your own, then opened it up for discussion simply to “educate us”, that would been less savvy than what you did. As I understand it, that would have been Old School.

Not being open to our input tells us that our ideas and opinions are less valuable than your own. It sets you up as an Omniscient Authority.

That distances and belittles people, and it discourages them from communicating with you. Instead, you did a very savvy thing. You let us know that we all have something valuable to say. You affirmed the value of this discussion, and that can only engage us more, make us want to contribute more.

You also let us know you are human, which increases the warmth of the communication. Speaking for myself, that makes me want to make sure you’re protected from moochers and critics –thereby enlisting us in promoting you, so you don’t have to do it yourself. You presented the story in a classy way, with no drama or complaining, so you definitely have my respect. A beautiful balance of professionalism and warm, effective community- building.

And yes, I agree –even if you didn’t do this on purpose– this is a great way to remind us all about your book

Now if this email was written by a reviewer at the NYT for example, that would be a wise investment to give to them.

The author of the asking provided you with what publication credentials that were of what value?

None.

None gets None.

You did fine, smart move.

“Qualified Traffic” is the phrase that comes to mind.

lol. Very cute. Thanks-

“Our site is a solid PR 4 site focused. A backlink from us is worth about four times the price of your book.”

I think we can complaint about this statement to Google to take some action against them on their display in Google SERP’s …hehe

Your response to his email was 100% correct…as was your non-response to his follow-up.

I call these people energy vampires. They just want someone…anyone…to “play catch with”. And when you decline, they get angry, pout and try to egg you into giving them what they want.

Ironically, this is proof you’re successful at what you do. That’s the only time these critics will show up…when you have achieved something they cannot.

Or as the saying goes, critics are people who hide in the hills until the battle is over and then come down to shoot the wounded.

Harsh, but often nonetheless true.

BC picks up blog posts from here.

My intention was definitely to bring light to this situation- which happens often online. And, to start a real conversation around it.

This being a professional blog serves as the ideal platform for this type of discourse.

I wasn’t planning on responding to the email, but was genuinely curious as to what people felt was the right course of action. Often these events go hidden, and no one talks about them.

This post wasn’t so much about me asking for help, but to leverage the situation to spark a meaningful conversation. What is the right course of action when things like this occur? I do have my opinions-but I am curious and respect other opinions.

I understand where you are coming from and I definitely think it’s an interesting and salient point to discuss. My original comment was meant as more of a constructive criticism on the phrasing and how it comes across.

Love the Shama TV by the way, watching through some of the backlog.